Book Tour Virgin is Will Clarke.com

I Am Going To A Funeral This Afternoon

A friend of mine from Legal Grounds passed away a few days ago from
cancer, and her services are today. She was young, and it's going to be
hard to say goodbye.

I am downtown, dropping off a portfolio and this sculpture at The Nasher
reminded me of my friend, Kelly.

Hold A Prayer For New Orleans

This photo was taken when I was there for my signing July 19th. Lots of
friends and family down there and all of them are in my prayers.

13 Questions for the Creator Of Lee Henry Oswald, One Of Fiction's Most Unlucky PIs

Meet my buddy, Harry Hunsicker. Commercial Real Estate Apraiser by day.  Super Ninja Noir Novelist by night.  His debut novel, STILL RIVER just came out form St. Martin's Minotaur this past May. The main character is the unfortunately named, Lee Henry Oswald, "Hank" for short. STILL RIVER has more thrills and near-death experiences than a joyride through Highland Park in a hotwired Camaro with a rockhead at the wheel. The book is exhilarating and dangerous and, well, fun in the heart -n-your-throat sort of way. It's the kind of book that grabs you by the shirt collar, slaps you around a little bit, and doesn't let you go until you finish.  Lee Child calls STILL RIVER, "A great new noir." That's THE Lee Child. 

Anyway. Harry and I are both in the same writers group in Dallas and we have both been working on our "careers" for the past 3 or 4 years. This past summer we both published our first novels with big fancy schmancy New York houses. So I thought I would ask Harry to tell us about the Summer he lost his book tour cherry.

So here it is.

1) How much weight have you gained or lost since your book came out?

HARRY: HUNSICKER: I’ve stayed neutral.

2) Your book came out in May 2005. Tell me what that month was like for you.

HH: Hectic, exhilarating and tiring all at the same time.  I had three official release parties, each designed to get media attention.  After that I was on the road every weekend for the next six weeks.  And I got sick three days before the official release date.

3) How many book events have you done to support STILL RIVER?

HH: I think I am up to about 35 signings and events.  I have a couple of more in September.

4) There are a lot of illusions that people hold about publishing a book. What’s the biggest illusion that you have been disabused of?

HH: Where are the groupies?

5) Do you read your own reviews?

HH: I had a signing in Tulsa not long ago.  The CRM  said, “I . . . uhh . . . read your KIRKUS review.”  I grimaced.  KIRKUS went out of their way to be cold-blooded.  (“Reads like a flyer for the National Rifle Association.”  WTF?)  The CRM looked from side to side and leaned a little closer.  “So did you screw that guy’s sister over or what?”

6) Did you take the tiny soap, lotion and shampoo from hotel bathrooms on your tour?

HH: I pocketed everything I could.

7) Your main character’s name is Lee H. Oswald. Any weird theater with conspiracy nuts during your book tour?

HH: Other than the death threat from a pair of sixty-something, Camelot-loving ex-hippies, no, nothing too weird has happened.  Well there was the pot head in Fort Worth, but he was pretty harmless.

8) The largest number of books sold at a book event? 9) The lowest number?

HH: I sold only one at my very first signing, at a Hastings in Wichita Falls, Texas.  That was before I learned the secret to hand selling:  Stand up; never ever sit down.  Always have a book in your hand and approach customers.  Speak to them.  Pitch the book.

My best signing (not counting release parties with family and friends in attendance) was last week at a Barnes & Noble in Plano, Texas.  I hand sold 22 books in two hours.  That’s a lot of work.

I think we sold 90 or so at one of the release parties.

10) Writers are solitary creatures for the most part. How did you prepare for the media and the public? Did you read books on this or take any classes? Did your agent or publicist coach you?

HH: I bought one of those Idiots’ Guide to Being a Dummy books on public speaking.  I read the first few pages, imagining the author sitting there in his underwear.  Didn’t help.  I tossed the book and hit the promo circuit cold.  Surprisingly, for someone with no public speaking experience, I’ve done really well.  I am a natural born ham I guess.  It helps that I’m talking about my passion as opposed to after-tax yields on mutual funds.

11) This question is for your wife, Allison. Do you have any tips for the spouses of writers who are just being published?

HH: Be supportive.  Learn where to get mood-altering prescription drugs on the Internet.

12) What do you wish someone had told you before you lost your book tour virginity?

HH:  Finish the second book, the one that’s already been contracted for and is under a deadline, BEFORE going on tour.   I’m just saying.

13) Cake or Pie?

HH: Chocolate pie from Luby’s.  With a mint leaf on top.  Eaten on a Sunday afternoon sitting next to a blue-haired woman wearing a lime-green pantsuit, an oxygen tank and walker by her side.  Memories are made of this.

Intermission Is Over

Sorry for the lack of posts. I have been writing these short stories for
the Texas Book Festival and polishing a screenplay and when I am doing
this, I find it hard to blog. I don't know how to describe why this is
so, but it is. Whatever part of my brain that makes up fiction doesn't
like to be on stage. In fact it needs to curl up and hide usually. So
know in the future that when my posts are lean that I am busy writing
fiction, that or taking too many naps.

Nevertheless, Act 2 of the Tour continues. In September, there are lots
of signings and readings: Three in Dallas. An NPR interview and a book
party in Seattle and maybe LA. I am flying out to Hollywood for 8 days
to take meeting with producers and the like. I will be staying at the
Standard on Sunset so the MoBlogging should kick ass, especially during
the end of Sept.

October will include the Texas Book Festival and November will allow a
peek behind the curtain at a booksellers' convention.

December will be a trip to San Miguel Mexico to research my third book,
The Insomnabulist.

Today, I am looking at my online banking and trying to manage my
cashflow which is more a trickle these days after not freelancing for 5
months and touring for 3 . But lucky for me I landed a really great new
client who does everything remotely AND they are fun to work with. I
just sent them my first invoice yesterday. Hopefully, they will use me
again soon and often and then my cashflow worries will be remedied- at
least for the time being which is all you can really hope for as a
freelance writer. October and November will definitely be a time to look
for freelance work.

Literary Publishing Blogs That I Like

No bigpost today. I am working on short stories to promote the Texas Book Festival. It's a contest where I write 400 words, they run 400 words in the Austin American Statesman (yes, a newspaper is printing fiction. Very Dickensian.) And then readers get to finish my story.

In the meantime while I work on this story, check out some of these literary bloggers. They are quite tasty.

POD-DY MOUTH GIRL
MISS SNARK
MAX BARRY
AGENT 007
SEPUCULTURE
BOOKANGST
FOREWORD
FRESH EYES
BOOK NINJA
MJ ROSE

Play With My Udders. I Will Play With Your Mind!

Someone is Selling My Obsever Article on eBay And I Promise It's Not Me

Cool. S'weird. But I am scratching my head as to why.

Click here to see what I am talking about

The Book Tour Continues

Fri, September 9—7:00 PM Reading at Garden Cafe 5310 Junius St, Dallas, 75214  - (214) 887-8330 7:00, Wine and Cheese. Reading will be Book Tour Virgin's Virgin Podcast.

Sun, September 11—12-10:00 PM Katrina Relief Concert, Poor David's Pub, 1313 S. Lamar, Dallas,TX

Wed, September 14—7:00 PM Signing at Borders Books & Music Preston Royal
10720 Preston Rd, Dallas,TX

Tues, September 20—1:00 PM KERA 90.1 Dallas, Texas, The Glenn Mitchell Show

Sun, September 18—4:30 PM, Barnes and Noble-University Village 2675 NE University Village Street, Seattle,WA. Party to follow at Chez deClarkenfel's

September 21-29—The BOOK TOUR VIRGIN goes to Holllwood and becomes THE SCREENPLAY WHORE. Podcasting live from The Standard Hollywood on Sunset. Stay tuned.

Fri, September 30—7:30 PM, Reading, The Writer's Garrett, Paperbacks Plus, Dallas, Texas

Sat, October 8— 2:30, AUTHOR OF THE MONTH Signing, Barnes & Noble Preston and Park, Plano, Texas - (972) 612-0999

Tue, October 18— 7:30 PM, Lakewood Book Club

Sat, October 22— 12:00 PM, Books-A-Million, Grapevine, Texas

October 28-30—Texas Book Festival, Austin, Texas (more details to come)

Fri, November 11—Books-A-Million Managers Meeting, Birmingham, Alabama

December Signing at Border's Books & Music Lovers & Greenville, Dallas, Texas ( more details to come)

Would-Be Authors Start Here

First question you need to ask yourself is "do you want to write or do you want to be published?" Because there are a lot of people out there (swing a dead cat and you'll hit one) who want to be published. But very few people actually want to write. Publishing is not writing. Writing is writing. That means before you start soliciting agents or publishers, you need to sit down and type all 378 pages of that Great American Novel you like to bring up every time you have a little too much wine at a dinner party. And then after you get all 378 pages down, you need to make them good. This might take a little more of your free time than you imagine. Buh-bye, TIVO. Hello, carpal tunnel.

The writing life has served me well, but not in ways that most people would think. While many of my friends have gone on to ascend to the golden, even platinum rungs of their chosen profession. I have spent the past 12 years dangling from the corporate ladder while I pecked out novels and read everything I could get my hands on. It has been a great 12 years. I wouldn't change a beat. But 12 years of barely scraping by, angsting over people who aren't actually real, and hunching over a keyboard, isn't for everyone.

So if you want to write, or if you are a writer, you need to ask yourself if it's really worth it. Do you really want to risk an easier life for a writing life? That's the bottom line. There's a reason why Virginia Woolf, Hemingway, and John Kennedy Toole all offed themselves, and it wasn't because they sold insurance. (Actually, Kafka made his living selling insurance, not from his writing)

Anyway, if the answer is yes, or even maybe, start with learning as much as you can about your craft. Actually, scratch that. Start with writing. Sit down and write. Everyday. That is what makes you a writer. Nothing more and nothing less. Then learn as you go. Take classes. Read great books.  Go to conferences. But most importantly, write.

While you are not writing then you might want to check out some of these conferences. My advice is to write until you can get into one, if not all three:

Bread Loaf
Sewanee
Squaw Valley

Texans check out these resources:

SMU's Continuing Education
The Writer's Garrett
Writers League of Texas

The Geometry Of Our Lives

In 1611 Galileo wrote:

"Philosophy is written in this grand book—I mean this universe—which stands continually open to our gaze, but it cannot be understood unless one first learns to comprehend the language and interpret the characters in which it is written. It is written in the language of mathematics, and it's characters are triangles, circles, and other geometrical figures, without which it is humanly impossible to understand a single word of it; without there, one is wandering about a dark labyrinth."

Our lives take a shape. Every birthday we get a new number to play with, and this new number has a shape, a geometry. The thing I always like to ponder on my birthday is how I will play with this shape. What are the lessons and opportunities that come with this new geometry and year of life? And how can I use this shape to better fulfill my role in "this grand book"?

Shakespeare said, "In nature's infinite book of secrecy, a little I can read."

I'll go one step further than the Baird, and assert that we don't only get to read from this book, but we get to write in it. We can fill the pages with the most amazing, beautiful, funny or tragic tales. We just need to know our place in this universe and understand what page the Big Mathematical Author in The Sky wants us to write on. From there we create the prose and poetry of everyday life—making beds, feeding kids, falling in love, etc.

Today, this geometry of life is what I am thinking about for my 35th year. I do this every birthday, and it's quite a fun actually. I realize it's not a usual way to spend a birthday—it might even sound a little whacked—but it is a glimpse behind my curtain so I thought I would blog about it.

While I am on the topic of numbers. Might I recommend THE BEGINNER'S GUIDE TO CONSTRUCTING THE UNIVERSE. It's a really fun read, and will make a number-lover out of even the most math-averse liberal arts major.